Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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