You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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