just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Randomize
