I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
