I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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