Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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