Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I'm sobbing to NWA
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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