I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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