Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
