whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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