WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
i've created a new STD.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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