About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
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