You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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