I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
thus making me awesome and them whores
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
