Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
