I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
