She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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