Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
nutella sex= disaster
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize