i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
