My first STD was from a foam party
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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