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I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
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