But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
