Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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