And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
