You made me cry and you don't even care
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
