You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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