The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
