She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
