So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize