so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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