its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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