Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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