the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
