im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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