Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Pants are for mortals
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
