bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
