Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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