I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
