Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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