i need an iv and a liver transplant
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
That was an excessively violent trivia night
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
