i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
God, I missed his penis.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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