I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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