I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
