Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
40s are totally the cure
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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