I'm really into asian looking animals
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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