we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Randomize
