At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
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