just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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