do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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