Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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